Assalamualaikum warohmatullahi wabarokatuh 

 

 

Part 1:

 

As most people know, I am not a religious person and, coming from America where there is supposed to be separation of church and state, religion was not part of my schooling while growing up. I'm not saying the separation of the two is complete or perfect in our country, but from my school experience, public schools have done a pretty good job keeping the two separate and refraining from encroaching on our religious freedom. To be clear, I am not anti-religion. I fully respect other people's faith in religion and enjoy learning about the different religions of the world; I just don't subscribe to one. So, why did I choose religion as my topic for this post? Because the Islamic religion is part of my everyday life in Indonesia. Most Americans acknowledge religion as one of those topics not to be discussed unless you are amongst friends. This is in drastic contrast to how people in Indonesia view religion.

In Indonesia, religion is a key part of personal and national identity and is one of the first questions out of someone's mouth when you first meet. Having been warned about this, I was prepared to say that while I went to church every once in a while as a child, the Christian religion never stuck and that I was simply not religious. In my mind, this seemed easy enough to explain, and if anything the people in my community would brand me as the non-religious volunteer who is excused because she is American. While true, relying on the excuse of being American was not how I wanted to define my time in Indonesia.

Yes, as Americans we are thought of as outsiders in our communities and, for multiples reasons, we will never fully be able to integrate. While this affords us some exemptions to cultural norms, this is not to our advantage. It is everything we have to fight against in an effort to disprove our differences and integrate into our communities. As volunteers, becoming trusted members of our villages is a key step in ensuring the success of our mission. Relying on the fact that as foreigners in this country, we will be exempt from the acceptable behaviors in Indonesian culture will automatically set a volunteer up for frustration and failure. It is not the goal of the Peace Corps to make volunteers forget their former selves and “go native” as we call it, but there are aspects of our lives in America that cannot be carried over. Some volunteers struggle with their religious identity and do not feel comfortable saying they follow any belief other than their own. To other volunteers, this is not an issue, either because their religion falls within the expectations of Indonesians or because they have decided that even though they may not be portraying their true selves, the topic of their religion, or the lack there of, was not a battle worth fighting. I fall into the latter group and don't mind saying that I am Christian if it allows me to focus more on my mission and creates one less obstacle in my way to completing it. Even though Christianity is not the main religion here, it is one that is recognized and stops people from worrying about my spiritual welfare.

As I explained in my first blog post, and as cheesy as it sounds, Peace Corps volunteers are sent on a mission with set goals we hope to accomplish. It is normal for volunteers to start their service wanting to change the world. This shows great drive and dedication, but is unrealistic. We have to focus on the goals at hand and the reasons we were set to our sites. While there is time to impact more areas than one, we have to pick and choose our battles, understanding that we cannot change everything in two years. And we shouldn't want to. Indonesia, with it's quirks and culture, is an amazing country full of unique treasures, which should be preserved for the generations to come.

 

 How religion works in Indonesia: the bare minimum explanation

 

Every Indonesian citizen is required to claim a religion. Being agnostic or atheist is not legally an option. The Indonesian government has recognized seven religions: Islam, Protestantism, Catholicism, Hinduism, Buddhism and Confucianism and every citizen must claim one of the seven as their own. A vast majority of the population is Muslim and, at least on the island of Java, the Islam religion is present where ever you go, whether it is the call to prayer, which is played over loud speakers five times a day, or it is the Islamic sayings that are present in everyday conversation.

When teachers walk into a classroom at MAN Ngraho, where I teach, they open the class by saying “assalamualaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh.” This roughly translates to “peace be upon you with Allah's blessings and prosper." This is quite an adjustment for someone who used to feel a tinge of annoyance whenever “praise be to God” or “God willing” or anything to that affect was slipped into conversation. (This is most likely because of my personal experience with the Christian religion, not because of the religion itself.) I am now surrounded by a religion I know little about and oddly enough, I don't get annoyed, uncomfortable or feel pressured by the religious presence here. Maybe because I am constantly aware that I am a visitor here and so should respect the local culture, but part of is comes from the fact that not once has anyone ever tried to convince me of the “rightness” of their religion or pressure me into a religious lifestyle.

Bhinneka Tunggal Ika, the official national motto of Indonesian, translates to Unity in Diversity. Not only do the Indonesians uphold this motto in the acceptance of people from all different backgrounds, but their welcoming nature is an exceptional test of their religious acceptance. Yes, there is religious conflict going on in certain parts of the country, but from my personal experience, the Indonesians I have come into contact with have upheld their nation's motto.

Part 2:

 

"You think the only people who are people, are the people who look like you. But if you walk the footsteps of a stranger, you'll learn things you never knew." Pocahontas 

 

Seeing firecrackers light up over a skyline of palm trees is an unforgettable sight. The last morning of Ramadan started at 2:30am, when a traditional Javanese band, loaded onto a truck, woke up the neighborhood for the last day of fasting. The day stretched out as everyone waiting for the call to prayer, marking the setting of the sun and the final buka puasa (breaking fast). At the first sounds coming from the mosque, the kids in the house ate as fast as they could before rushing outside loaded with enough ammunition to go to war. Every type of firecracker imaginable was cradled under these kids arms as they prepared for battle. For the next few hours, the kids laid everything they had on the line. As you can imagine, it was a noisy few hours with firecrackers going of in every neighborhood and prayers were played over loud speaker from every mosque celebrating the end of Ramadan. At first I was overwhelmed and nervous about a house catching on fire as little regard was taken for safety. But once I adjusted and reminded myself that there was nothing I could do but sit back and watch the show, I was able to look up to appreciate the beauty of my surroundings and the sense excitement in the neighborhood.

During the month of Ramadan each day starts around 3:30am with Sahur, early morning breakfast before the sun rises. The man at the local mosque will call out over loud speakers waking the neighborhood and inviting everyone to eat before prayer. Once eating and praying is over, most will take a quick nap before rising once more to start the day around 5:30am. Once the sun rises, Muslims do not eat, drink, swear or have sex until the sun goes down around 5:30pm. I didn't want to allow myself to make excuses for not fully experiencing the Indonesian lifestyle so I decided to give it a try. Not for any religious reason, but to see what it felt like for the teachers, students and other people in my community to make it through the day without food or drink. This was a chance to bond with my community and make it through each day in solidarity with one another.

Ramadan only lasted 2 weeks for me. The first week started out strong: waking up at 3:30am for breakfast, then not eating or drinking until 5:30pm. On hotter days, I would drink water but I more or less stuck with it. Week two started the same way but there were a few days I couldn't make myself get out of bed for breakfast, so I would eat around 6am, then fast for the rest of the day. By week three, this was happening everyday. Then came week 4: the endless snacking and drinking through out the day. I could no longer pretend that I was fasting and had to admit to myself that Ramadan was over for me. Without the religious willpower behind the action, fasting didn't mean as much to me and so ending it early much more likely. This got me thinking about how much of the Indonesian culture I’m actually able to experience. Because I am not Muslim, there is only so much of the religious activities I can partake in and no matter how open the people are to sharing their lives with me, there are some things I will never be able to fully understand. There is a limit to how much I can integrate and, while I'm no where near that limit yet, I have accepted that there are certain parts of this culture I will never be able to experience.

For a while this got me thinking about what defines a community. I would think to myself "isn't that a foundational part of what a community is? People being bound together through common experiences and circumstances?" A community is built to support the people in it and bond them through commonalities. I have founded my own community here, brought together by shared silliness, confusion and dedication to understanding the unfamiliar, but I will never be part of the Muslim community that I am constantly surrounded by. But just because I am not part of the Muslim community, does not mean that it does not affect me. I interact with the Muslim community everyday. My community if built on the Muslim community, neighborhood community and school community that preexisted my arrival. The slate isn't wiped clean every time someone enters a new space. Relationships build on one another and so do communities.

While I've enjoyed the opportunity to learn about a religion generally feared and misunderstood in the US, the more I come in contact with different religions, the more I question organized religion as a whole. It's hard to feel like you can be fully open and honest about religion here when it is such an important part of the culture, but every once in a while, you find someone who is willing to ask the questions they don't already know the answer to. To really want to know what your life and experiences are like, without being afraid of what you might say, accepting the answer no matter what. These are the people, open-minded and willing to accept everything about you, I want as my friends.

I know that this post may not sit well with some readers, so please accept these thoughts as my own personal experience with religion, not as an attack on anyone's beliefs. I believe everyone has a soul that needs tending to, so whether you take care of your soul through religion, yoga or listening to good music, do what feels right to you.

I also acknowledge that religion, culture and community are all separate concepts, but they are so closely linked especially where I am living now. I think most will understand my flow from one to the other but if not, let me know and I will try to clarify! I would love to talk more about these things. My blog posts reflect conversations I have had with myself and I would love to continue these conversations with you!

“Be patient toward all that is unsolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves, like locked rooms and like books that are now written in a very foreign language. Do not seek the answers, which cannot be given to you because you would not be able to live them. And the point is, to live everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps you will then gradually, without noticing it, live along some distant day into the answer.” -Rainer Maria Rilke

MAN Ngraho, where I will be teaching

So I've made it. I was officially sworn in as a Peace Corps volunteer and safely traveled to my permanent site...where I am unbelievably bored. It has been about three weeks since I've been living in Ngraho and I've got nothing to do. School is on break until next week and with the start of Ramadan, the people of Ngraho spend their days resting and doing little else.

My 5 year old host brother

We've been warned that this would happen. It is called a “duka” and I'm in one. The phrase “suke dan duka” is the Indonesian version of “ups and downs” and I've hit the down. We have an amazing medical team who warned us that there is usually a dip in moral around this time, but after an amazing 2 months of training I didn't see it coming. The first few weeks at site have been tough. The environment is different, new relationships need building and I am no longer surrounded by my support team of other volunteers within walking distance.

Men's prayer meeting held at our house for the start of Ramadan

Over the past few weeks I have contemplated why I felt unhappy at site and came to realize that it was because I was looking for an end result, when this is just the beginning. I was feeling so alone and isolated at my new site. I had gotten used to the tight knit community during training and forgot how hard it was when I had first arrived. I was looking for the 2 months of integrating I had accomplished in Batu, to simply appear intact in Ngraho. While that is not the way the world works, there is an entire new village and school community waiting to build relationships at my new site. It is time to put in the work and, while this will never be easy, building relationships now will not only help me integrate into the community, it will also push me towards my happy (whatever that may be).

No one every said the Peace Corps was easy, so I am determined to work through this adjustment period and find the joy in “living the questions now,” whether it is dealing with the mosquito larva in the mandi, the rats running through the walls or the noise from the main state road I live on. This village, my school and my host family have welcomed me into their lives, their community and their hearts, and I will strive to show my gratitude every day of my service. 

No experience is ever perfect. Finding the light in the darkness.

“We are visitors on this planet. We are here for ninety or one hundred years at the very most. During that period, we must try to do something good, something useful, with our lives. If you contribute to other people's happiness, you will find the true goal, the true meaning of life.” - Dalai Lama

Life is short, so with my “nothing left to lose” attitude I packed my bags and moved to the other side of the world. The Indonesian island of Java, to be exact. This blog is not meant to be a piece of creative genius or excellent literature. It is too document my adventure and share my experience with friends, family and anyone else who cares to read it. With my personal disclaimer out of the way, the Peace Corps would like me to add, “The contents of this Web site are mine personally and do not reflect any position of the U.S. Government or the Peace Corps.”

Now, about me doing “something good, something useful” during my visit on planet earth... When I first applied to the Peace Corps, I was hoping to work in a medical or public health capacity, knowing that other than the pre-med courses I took, I had little experience in the area. The NYU Peace Corps recruiter, a friendly laid back grad student, took one look at my resume and told me I would be perfect for the education division and that if accepted, I would probably be teaching English.

I am a huge advocate when it comes to the development of education, but the last thing I thought I wanted to do was teach English as a foreign language. My interpretation of the Peace Corps mission was to assist in the development of countries by providing the manpower necessary to train local people so they can one day contribute to the development of their country for themselves. A “development by the people, for the people” type of mentality. When I got my invitation to join the Peace Corps, I had trouble finding the correlation between this mentality and my assignment to teaching English, which felt neocolonialist and unsustainable.

I found that there were a few problems with the way I was thinking about the assignment and the Peace Corps mission. First of all, I was forgetting about parts of the Peace Corps mission which focused on cross-cultural exchange, which would take place simply by being in country, interacting with Indonesian nationals and sharing my experience with those back in the states. Secondly, the Indonesian government asked for Peace Corps volunteers to aid in the development of the English Language program. My assignment, instead of ignoring the local culture, will help students share their culture and succeed in an ever globalizing world. Lastly, it was naive of me to think that the only beneficiaries would be the relatively few number of students I would teach in my two years. Not only will the students benefit, but teacher would gain new teaching methods and the community will take part in the cross-cultural exchange. The list goes on.

It has been about two months since I've arrived in Indonesia and I am happy to say I can't imagine being anywhere else in the world right now. Something feels right when I think about the fact that I will be living here for the next two years. Everyday as I walk through the village, over looking the rice patties surrounded by mountains all I can think is how fortunate I am to be in this country. Like Alysia Harris says, “What is not beautiful about today?”

Training will be coming to a close in one week, after which we will swear in as volunteers and leave Batu for our permanent sites in East Java, West Java or Madura. I am Bojonegoro bound. My new home will be located in the northwestern corner of East Java and I could not be more excited to get there and start experiencing real Peace Corps life.

Step one in contributing to other people's happiness is putting yourself in a position to do so.